Episode #9
“No Other Sons or Daughters”
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(Al’s bedroom, Al is sitting on the edge of the bed
fondling Trixie’s gold nugget.
Trixie is asleep next to him.
He looks at her and bangs the nugget on the table to awaken
her.)
Al: Her majesty awakes, huh? (Walks over to the piss-pot)
Cocksucker’s gonna grace us with
his fuckin’ presence this mornin’.
Fuckin’ Magistrate Claggett
will impart to me the attitude toward the settlement of him and his fellow lying
fucking thieves of the territorial legislature at Yankton. (Finishes his pissing and proceeds to
dress.) How fuckin’ much is it gonna cost us to get annexed when to get
annexed when they sign a treaty with the fuckin’ dirt worshippers, huh? How hard is the legislature gonna
squeeze our balls with regard to our title and properties, huh? I don’t want to talk to these
cocksuckers, but you have to, in life, you have to do a lot of things you don’t
fuckin’ want to do. Many
times, that’s what the fuck life is, one vile fucking task after
another. But don’t get
aggravated. Then the enemy has you
by the short hair. It’ll be
different after the annexation.
That’s all. There’s nothin’
to be afraid of. Everything
changes. Don’t be afraid. ( points down at the gold) I can hope
those’ll be appearing on a regular basis.
Trixie: No.
Al:
No? (Looks out window, hands in his pockets.)
How’s your arm?
Trixie:
It’s alright.
Al:
Don’t fucking try it, doin’
away with yourself again, huh?
(Al walks away from the window into his office,
Trixie raises herself up onto her elbows and watches him
leave.)
(Seth & Ellsworth are heading to the restaurant,
as they pass it’s window we see Alma serving Sophia her breakfast as Sophia is
watching them through the window.
The men enter the restaurant and as they approach the table, Sophia is
playing with her bacon.)
Alma:
Good morning,
gentlemen.
Seth:
This is Ellsworth, who found
the gold on your claim.
Alma:
How do you do, Mr.
Ellsworth?
Ellsworth:
Pleasure.
Alma:
And this is
Sophia.
Ellsworth:
Pleasure, Sophia.
Alma: I’m grateful for your expertise and keen
eyesight.
Ellsworth: Luck’s
what you want to congratulate me on, Mrs. Garrett.
Seth: Until
you decide how you want to develop it, Ellsworth can spend time enough at wages
on your claim to sustain your ownership.
Alma: I’m not as if
I understand what you just said. (Smiling)
Seth: He’ll explain it all to you.
Alma: Might we have
a word, Mr. Bullock? (They walk to the archway) I’m certain
Mr. Ellsworth’s are very capable hands, but I hope you’re not disassociating
yourself from my affairs.
Seth: I
already got my impression of this fellow, Mrs. Garrett. This meeting’s how you form
yours.
Alma: I
see.
Seth: Then we
compare notes and decide how you proceed.
Alma:
Fine.
Seth: Toward a
future point when you tell me my
thinkin’s so consistently wrongheaded it’s a waste of your valuable time having
to deal with me. (Alma smiles at
this.)
Alma: In any case, I know you have many claims on your
attention.
Seth: A
couple.
Alma: Thank you very
much.
Seth: I’d lean
more on what I felt about this fellow than what I saw.
(Touches
the brim of his hat and exits through the hotel entrance. A red-headed hotel employee enters at
the same time.)
EB: Late as usual.
Redhead:
I just comes from the creek,
Mr. Farnum. Washin’ my
pants.
EB:A
habit to cultivate.
Redhead:
And under a rock down there, I found other pants of mine that I thought
I’d lost. But seein’ as I gets
drunk and, on occasion shits myself, I figured that must be how I lost ‘em in
the first place.
EB: I imagine you makin’ your way from the
creek rolling into the lobby when all others are abed, bare ass naked with shit
streamin’ down your legs.
Redhead:
Sir, no. It must have been
the night that Mr. Hickok was killed.
Now I recall that Mr. Hickok, he gives unto me like a letter for me to
put in the post, but what with all the hullabaloo and me getting drunk, I forgot
about the whole ting. Uh, until I
found my pants. (Pulls out the
letter)
EB:
Do you think I’m gonna touch
that?
Redhead:
No, uh, I didn’t get my pants wet, eh, and nor did I soil the letter when
soiled myself, hey. That’s the
miracle of it, sir.
EB: So I’m to believe that’s a letter written
by Wild Bill Hickok just before his murder by the coward
McCall?
Redhead: Just
minutes before, sir.
EB: Addressed to whom?
Redhead: His wife,
sir.
EB: Well I only hope you haven’t opened
it.
Redhead: No,
sir.
EB: Well at least that eliminates tampering
from the list.
Redhead: Of what,
sir?
EB: Crimes, in which your inebriation
and sloth as my employee has implicated my hotel, which I will attempt to shield
you from in the course of trying to extricate myself.
Redhead: I didn’t mean to extricate you, sir. I uh, I—I didn’t –
EB: Just give me the confounded letter. (Redhead hangs his head) And none of this hangdog
look.
Redhead: Sir.
EB: Not a word of this to
anyone.
Redhead: Yes,
sir.
(The
redhead walks off to the restaurant and as he passes the hotel entrance we see
Charlie Utter enter.)
EB: Mr. Utter.
Hearty congratulations on your new venture.
Utter: Take a while
to find out if those are what’s in order.
(Looks at the floor and back up,
approaches EB) Bein’ this is the first day of my enterprise, I wore this
frock coat.
EB: Very flattering.
Utter: You don’t
think it looks stupid?
EB: Not to me, no.
(In the
restaurant, Alma and Elsworth are talking while Sophia looks
on.)
Ellsworth:
Mr. Dority, all of a sudden
stumbled, and in – in grabbin’ at scrub to steady him, I saw a color
beneath. (Sophia plays peek-a-boo with Ellsworth,
Ellsworth takes his hands away from his eyes and laughs) Ain’t you a little
doll.
Alma: She’s formed
an instant attachment.
Ellsworth: Well, anyways, I’m glad to keep your title good
workin’ the surface, but the quartz outcrop we found, you’re not gonna know how
rich your strike is until you sink some shafts. Now, I ain’t expert prospectin’ that
way. I’m a man who works in
creeks.
Alma: Thank you for
telling me so.
Ellsworth: Not bein’ impertinent, your people gonna help you
with this?
Alma: My brother and
my father are aware of my situation and my husband’s parents. I have no idea as to the prospect of
their involvement.
Ellsworth: Well, blood don’t always prove loyalty, but you’re
gonna need some people on your side, Mrs. Garrett, ‘cause I believe you got a
big one on your hands.
Alma: I believe Mr.
Bullock’s on my side.
Ellsworth: No question about that.
Alma: And I believe
you are, tool. (Ellsworth smiles )
Utter: Excuse
me. I was among them found that
little girl. I’m glad to see her
doin’ well.
Alma: I’m Alma
Garrett.
Utter: How do you
do?
Ellsworth: Ellsworth. (Standing up, shakes Utter’s
hand)
Utter: Charlie Utter.
(Al’s
office, Al is looking out the window at the sign for “Utter Freight and Postal
Delivery Service, there is a knocking at the door.)
Al:
Come in.
Johnny: Yes,
sir.
Al: You
see this? “Utter Freight and Postal
Delivery Service.” That’s what happens when you drop a fucking
stitch.
Johnny: What
stitch did I drop?
Al: I
did. This freight and delivery
service should’ve been opened by Persimmon Phil as a cover for his other fuckin’
activities.
Johnny: He’s
dead.
Al: I
know he’s dead now.
Johnny: Well,
if you don’t know, nobody does.
Al: I
should have brought in a replacement, is my fucking point.
Johnny: Well,
you’ll know better next time.
Al: The
direction of my thoughts – with the sustained fucking stupidity that you’re
exhibiting, I hesitate to voice them.
Is that you might want to train for Phil’s former
position.
Johnny: Al…I
have hoped for this conversation ever since you give me that Indian head to
hide. (Proud, determined look on his
face.)
(Al just
looks at Johhny, walks past him, not taking his eyes off of him smiles, nods his head and leaves Johnny
standing in his office. Johnny is
excited.)
(Downstairs, Dan is shaving, Al comes down the
stairs.)
Dan: How’d it go with Johnny?
Al: I have
just fled my own office in horror at his fucking
dimwittedness.
Dan: (Smiles and chuckles.) Well, Persimmon
Phil wasn’t no genius.
Al: I know.
Dan: And Johnny, so
eager.
Al: I know. Was it not my fuckin’ idea to ask
him? As a minimal standard eager,
he’ll be in the wilderness. You
gotta be able to sustain a thought.
You gotta be able to remember fucking instructions.
(Magistrate
Claggett enters the Gem.)
Dan: His honor.
Al: Oh, yeah. Hold fast your
valuables.
Johnny: (Coming down the stairs) Hey, Al. Any reason I can’t share with Dan the
uh, proceedings of the talk me and you just had about me uh, takin’ over for
Persimmon Phil?
Al: Yeah, keep Dan in the dark.
(Johnny
looks at Al, confused)
Dan: Hey, Johnny.
Johnny:
Dan.
Dan: What’s new?
(Johnny
looks down quickly. Meanwhile,
Magistrate Claggett sit down at a table and Al is standing up on the other side
of the table.)
Al: I
want to know how the camp stands with the legislature. And don’t give me the um, “on the one
hand and on the other hand,” hmm?
Magistrate
Clagett: Alright.
Al: Just say, “This is the way I think it’s
gonna be,” ‘cause this “several hands” fuckin’ shit don’t help me,
huh?
Magistrate
Clagett: I’ll boil things
down.
Al: Go ahead.
Magistrate
Clagett:
Well, let’s assume for the sake of conversation that there’s a new treaty
with the Sioux peoples.
Al: “People,” that’s what we’re callin’ those
cocksuckers now? Now, that’s the
way things are headed?
Magistrate
Clagett:
Assuming the new treaty, the hills will be annexed. The territory respects the statutes of
the Northwest Ordinance, which state that a citizen can have title to any land
unclaimed or unincorporated by simple usage. Essentially, if you’re on it and you
improve it, you own it. But, what
complicates the situations is that the hills were deeded to the Sioux by the
1868 Fort Laramie Treaty. This
could mean that the land occupied by the camp doesn’t fall under any statutory
definition of unclaimed or unincorporated.
Al: So who needs to get
paid?
Magistrate
Clagett: Signs of conciliation and willingness
would weight in the camp’s favor, but just as important is the presence of a Ad
Hoc municipal organization that would enable the legislature to say Deadwood
exists, we don’t have to create it.
It would be disruptive if we did.
The community’s already organized, not legally, maybe, but certainly
informally. Why not let’s give this
informal organization the blessing of legal standing?
Al: What’s the right fucking number for the
legislature?
Magistrate
Clagett: There’s a lot of gold out here, Al. To define “right” in this environment is
very liable to be an ongoing process. What I’m prepared to do is make a list of
names and preliminary guess at some numbers. (Clagett moves his inkpot over to his right
side, dips his quill and proceeds to write his list.) I should tell you as
well that a warrant’s reached Yankton charging you with murder in Chicago,
Illinois. As the settlement’s
status changes, you want to address that.
I could help with that, too.
Al: How much is that gonna cost
me?
Magistrate
Clagett:
$5,000. If you don’t mind,
I’ll continue writing.
(Al sits
back in his chair, stewing.)
(The
Reverend approaches the pest tent, limping slightly)
Rev: Good morning, Miss Jane.
Jane: (Ripping
clothes for bandages with her teeth) Yeah, hello.
No one’s croaked today.
Tommy’s took fuckin’ sick and the Doc’ll be back I guess whenever he
fuckin’ feels like it. I see your
fuckin’ eyes are still playin’ tug o’ war.
Rev: Well, um, (pointing to his right eye) this is the
one to look at.
Jane: Uh, left arm
still useful as an old man’s dick?
Rev: Do I smell strangely to you, Miss
Jane?
Jane:
What?
Rev: Do I have a strange odor about
me?
Jane: What is that,
your clever way of saying you smell whiskey on my breath?
Rev: No.
Jane: If either of
your fuckin’ eyes takes me for hidin’ I’m drinkin’ again, occasionally, it’s
sadly mistaken. So desist from any
clever odor references.
Rev: I thought the smell might be coming off
the creek, so I went into the hills last night, but it followed me there,
too. As if my, uh, as if my – my
flesh were rotting. I, uh…do I
looks like a man taken from his own grave?
Jane: Goddamn you,
Preacher, don’t start talkin’ crazy to go with everything
else.
Rev: Uh, also, when I read the—the scriptures,
I do not feel Christ’s love as I used to.
Jane: Oh,
is that so? That is too bad. Join
the fucking club of the most of us.
Let me tell you somethin’, Preacher. I see you skulkin’ around when the Doc
comes in. You’re tryin’ to hide
your fuckin’ eyes, tryin’ to hide your fuckin’ arm. You’re a fuckin’ mess. (Shakes the Rev’s shoulders) And I am in
the process of wearin’ out my own fuckin’ welcome in this camp, and I wouldn’t
expect to be around here much longer for people to be disgusted by so they don’t
notice what the fuck is goin’ on with you!
And you need to (grabs his head)
think about some of these things and raise your nerve to consult with the
Doc!
(Jane walks
away from the Rev, he smiles but looks confused. He turns and puts his bible down and
attempts to lift the water basin, spilling some of
it.)
Jane: Oh,
Goddamn you! Spillin’ my cleanin’
water too, Minister! (She wrenches the basin from him and shoves
him onto the ground just outside the tent.
She looks at him, frustrated, then helps him up from the ground).
Oh. Oh.
Rev: Thank you, I’m fine.
Jane: You’re
fine. I am off duty. You’re on duty. (Slaps his shoulder) You can go fuck
yourself!
(The Rev
looks at her and smiles as she’s leaving.
We see Jane leave the pest tent, she pauses and pulls a bottle of whiskey
out of her coat pocket, takes a drink, and walks
away.)
(Grand
Central, EB is studying the letter from Wild Bill with a magnifying glass. He turns the letter over and is
about to open it with a letter opener – we see Al approaching, coffee in hand –
EB sees him and immediately puts the letter down and the letter opener under his
armpit.)
EB: Al, what are you doin’ out?
Al: Clearing my head. And if I bleet when I speak that’s
because I just got fuckin’ fleeced.
EB: What’s goin’ on?
Al: Be in my joint in two hours. We’re forming a fucking
government.
EB: Yes, sir.
(Al leaves,
stands on the porch of the hotel for a moment, looks left, then right, sees
Merrick’s newsstand and heads for Merrick’s office door. He tries to open the door, it’s locked.)
Al: Merrick!
Jesus Christ! Hey Merrick! (Wiping off the main window, trying to peer
inside – he turns around and proceeds back across the porch of the hotel). Cocksucker.
(Hardware
store, Sol is measuring gold dust out onto a scale.)
Guy: Shoot.
Sol:Thank
you, sir. (Hands the bag of gold dust to the
man.)
Guy: Uh-huh.
Sol:Good
luck out there. (Man leaves)
Seth: I
believe it’s time to send for my wife and boy. (Sol looks at him, surprised) Treaty
comin’ with the Sioux.
Al: (Shouting as he enters the hardware store)
Where the fuck is Merrick, huh?
Seth: We don’t know.
Al: Well, anyways, this is it. What we spoke about before, this puts it
to the test.
Seth:
Alright.
Al: Informal municipal organization. Not government. No, that would mark us rebellious. But structure enough to persuade those
territorial cocksuckers in Yankton that we’re worthy enough to pay them their
fucking bribes.
Sol: Uh, we’re to meet to discuss putting this
organization together, is that what you’re saying?
Al: (Looks at Seth, Points to Sol…)
Centuries of fucking inbreeding attune him to the necessities of the
times. (Sol laughs) Two hours, my place! (Turns around and starts to leave, pauses)
Did a fucking good job here. (Raises his coffee cup to them in a sort of
toast, and leaves.)
(Bella
Union, Eddie is shuffling cards, Joanie comes downstairs and pours herself some
coffee from the urn sitting on his table.)
Eddie: You’re room’s put back
together.
Joanie:
That ain’t my room anymore. (She sits)
Eddie: Cy needn’t a done for them kids that way. Not in your room, not in the way he did
for them.
Joanie:
I’m getting’ outta here,
Eddie.
Eddie: Are ya?
Joanie:
I’m going to open my own place.
Eddie: Good for you, honey. Have you saved
money?
Joanie: I
got a way to work it.
Eddie: I know you’ll get a long way away from here
first.
Joanie:
You think I have to? (Puts her cup down, places her fingertips on
the table nervously) Cy told me
he’d help me open a place here. He
promised he’d keep his distance.
Eddie: Good.
(Al enters BellaUnion)
Al: Is he around?
Eddie: Asleep.
Al: There’s a meetin’ at my place in a couple of
hours he’ll want to be awake for, all the pillars of the fuckin’ camp. (Points to coffee urn) You mind? (Joanie shakes her head – Al turns to Eddie)
You could use some rest.
Eddie: I
could use a clean conscience.
Al: So could we all.
(Joanie
looks down at the table, Al leaves the Bella Union, stepping out into the
street, he takes a sip of the coffee)
Al: Blech! (Spitting out the coffee and dumping the rest on the ground, Al spots Merrick.) Where the fuck have you been?
Merrick: As you
see.
Al: As I see what?
Merrick:
At my storage cabinet replenishing needed supplies.
Al: Be over in a couple of hours. We gotta form a government for the
settlement.
Merrick:
Who does?
Al: Us!
You and me. Come to me in a
vision! You stupid
bastard.
(Al walks
into the Gem, Merrick’s assistant looks at him and Merrick
smiles.)
(Bella
Union)
Joanie:
(Sipping her coffee) Anyways, I’m goin’ to look for a
place.
(Joanie
gets up from the table, Eddie watches her leave the Bella Union, sad look on his
face.)
Cy: Eddie.
(Calling down from Upstairs
balcony)
Eddie: wearengen’s called a meeting. Two hours.
Cy: (Descending stairs) Where’s
Joanie?
Eddie: Out lookin’ for a place.
Cy: Good.
‘Cause I told Joanie I’d back her in havin’ her own
joint.
Eddie: That’s what she
said.
Cy: Something on your mind,
Eddie?
Eddie: You
fucked me up, Cy. The shit you did
to those kids, there’s no angle to it.
Cy: That shit wasn’t just about those kids,
Eddie. And you need to sit there
and tough your way through your problem.
Just keep shufflin’ your cards and let your tie hang down ‘til you feel
better.
Eddie: I want to
come to that meeting.
Cy: Do ya? Come ahead, Eddie. Put the cards down, tighten your cravat
and come on if it’ll cheer you the fuck up.
(Joanie is
walking through chink’s alley. She
passes by Wu. They look at each
other as she passes. She continues
on but Wu’s eyes never leave her.
She stops at the pig pen. We
hear the pigs squealing. She sees
Flora’s clothes clumped up in the corner of the pigpen and looks back at
Wu. He is still watching her. She looks back to the pigs and turns
away in slight disgust. She takes a
deep settling breath and proceeds through the alley through throngs of
chattering people. We see her step
across a makeshift bridge across a deep puddle and when she steps off the end of
the bridge, she foot goes deep into the puddle. She continues across the thoroughfare,
stopping at Utter Freight.)
Utter:
Mornin’.
Joanie:
Good Morning. (She starts to head
away)
Utter: I’m opening
this business.
Joanie: (Stops, turns around and looks up at his
sign.) Well, good
luck.
Utter:
Thank you. I’m Charlie Utter.
Joanie: I’m
Joanie Stubbs.
Utter: How do you
do?
Joanie: How do
you do, Charlie? Ooh, I was out of
breath, but now I’m better.
Utter: Are you off
someplace? Uh, you need a escort or
the like?
Joanie: No, I’m
more or less just walkin’ around.
Utter: What do you
think of this frock coat?
Joanie: (She steps a little closer) Very well
fitted.
Utter:
I had it made up in
Cheyenne. I’m one for a good
appearance and all, but it’s a little out of my path.
Joanie: If you
would have made me guess, I would have said it’s not your usual
garb.
Utter: And I’m a
considerable hand at the freight business, but far as leasin’ this buildin’
before knowin’ what the traffic’s gonna bear, I don’t know what possessed
me. See, I—I do well in a camp or a
settlement or a township, but that don’t make me a camp or a settlement or a
township type. This is the attire
for that type…of type.
Joanie: Anyway,
you’re wearing it today.
Utter: You’re
right. I’m sorry for runnin’ on
about it.
Joanie: I’m
looking for a piece of property to start a business on. That’s what I’m doin’
out.
Utter: I see. And what sort of business you lookin’ to
operate?
Joanie:
Brothel.
Utter: Uh-huh. Well, uh, I’ll tell you what, this camp
here, it seems like it’s got some legs under it.
Joanie: I’m
just a whore, though. I mean, I run
the whore for this man, but far as bein’ ready to run a place and stand up to
all you have to stand up to, I—I don’t know what go into
me.
Utter: I tell you
what, (steps a little closer),
something’s ready for you to do somethin’, don’t seem to matter if you’re
ready or not.
Joanie: Better
lift you skirts and…jump, huh?
Utter: That’s what’s comin’ to me to be true.
Joanie: I’m
surprised you’re not at that big town meeting.
Utter: Uh, yeah,
well, um, I’m uh, I’m headin’ over there shortly. Uh, I prefer to appear late to that type
of thing.
Joanie: Bella
Union, where I work, is bigger, but I guess bein’ that it’s Mr. Swearengen’s
meeting, that’s why they’re having it at the Gem.
Utter: Yeah, that’s –
that’s why it’s located there.
Joanie:
Yeah. It’s awful nice to
meet you, Charlie.
Utter: Well, it’s
good to meet you, too, Joanie. (Tips his hat to her, she walks on) Take
care.
(Doc’s at
the pest tent fastening the straps on his medical case. To his right, behind a mesh drape, the
Rev is having another seizure. The
Doc starts to leave and walks right past him and
pauses.)
Doc: I’m goin’ to the Gem.
(The Doc
leaves, the Rev is still sitting on a cot, leaned up against a post, having a
mild seizure. We see the Doc walking
down chink’s alley, he passes Jane who is standing up, leaning with her forehead
against a wall, napping. He stops
and takes a closer look at her, looks away and back
again.)
Doc: I’m headin’ for the Gem.
Jane: Hooray for
you.
Doc: Reverend is laid down tryin’ to hide
another seizure.
Jane: Ain’t you
clever to see through the subterfuge.
Doc: (A
tear runs down the side of his nose) I been lettin’ it go, but if the idea
is for you to drink more and more ‘til I say somethin’, I am hereby officially
sayin’ I wish you would stop fuckin’ drinkin’.
Jane: I
have no fuckin’ idea (Jane pulls away
from the wall abruptly) as far as you sayin’ one fuckin’ thing about
anything I do or don’t, far as drinking or where I stand and nap or any other
fuckin’ thing concernin’ me.
Doc: I see.
(We see
Charlie start to pass the alley way and stop to observe the exchange.)
Jane: To
go or leave, don’t or when
Doc: Alright, Jane.
Jane: So you can go
fuck yourself. And don’t try and
hasten anyone anywhere, ‘cause everyone follows their own fuckin’ pace, and
don’t try and fuckin’ hasten them.
(points her finger at the Doc.)
And you happen to be fuckin’ overlookin’ that you think it’s just one day
after another with the same fuckin’ seizure as if it happened the week
before. And that just shows you how
much you fuckin’ know. And what you
pay attention to. Goddamn
you!
(Jane slams
her forehead against the wall and resumes her former position. The Doc lowers his head, almost as if he
is ashamed. Charlie is still
looking on. The Doc walks away and
proceeds to the Gem. Charlie
approaches Jane, casually.)
Utter:
What do they pay you to hold
that buildin’ up?
Jane: Charlie Utter
of “Utter Charlie and Freight.”
Utter: Close enough
to get you offered a position.
Jane: I’m
in a position, you eternally meddling cocksucker.
Utter: Yeah, leaning
forward, shit-faced drunk.
Jane: I am talking
about nursing the plague, fucking tent operation. Caring of the sick in the fuckin’
tent!
Utter: How about
bullwhacker of the fuckin’ freight between Deadwood and
Cheyenne?
Jane:
No.
Utter: How about
supervisor, mail delivery?
Jane: Go away,
Charlie.
Utter: Or any fuckin’
thing else you want to do.
Jane: Go Away! Congratulations on bein’ a big fuckin’
deal.
Utter: No one’s any
big fuckin’ deal, Jane. And all
them offers stand.
Jane: I seen you in
some stupid fuckin’ outfits in my time, but that one takes the
prize.
(Charlie
walks away, shaking his head.)
(Doc is in
the whore’s room, checking up on their health.)
Doc: I think that this month, we’re gonna try raspberry
leaf.
Whore: Thanks,
Doc.
Doc: Young lady, anything to report with your
privates?
Trixie: (smoking a cigarette)
Nah.
Doc: (Pulls up
Trixie’s sleeve to check her arm)
Oh, Uh—(gets up to go to his bag, Al walks
in)
Al: Meetin’ outside when you’re done,
Doc.
Doc: Alright. (Al leaves – Doc dabs some ointment on
Trixie’s arm. Replaces the lid and
puts it in her hand, he squeezes her hand as he gets
up.)
Trixie: Thanks,
Doc.
Doc: In a case like yours I wouldn’t know what
else to prescribe. (He lets go of her hand and gets his case
together, leaves the room.)
(Gem
Saloon, Johnny is setting out pears & peaches on the tables, now pushed
together in preparation for the meeting.
Doc is sitting on the stairs, E.B. and Eddie are standing off to the
side, idling, waiting for something to happen. Seth and Sol walk in, take a seat, we
see Merrick and Cy talking.)
Al: Whose idea was them pears and fuckin’
peaches?
Johnny: I
figured since we had ‘em for the plague meetin’.
( Merrick
and Cy take a seat, Eddie sitting off to the side behind Cy. EB and the Doc join soon
after.)
Al: Shows good thinkin’ and initiative. Ladle ‘em out at various intervals on
the fuckin’ table, Johnny.
Johnny: Yes,
sir.
Al: I’m
declaring myself conductor of this meeting as I have the bribe
sheet.
(Tom
Nuttall walks in, stops at the end of the table.)
Nuttall:
If I’m excluded, say so,
Al. Don’t leave me to die the death
of a thousand cuts.
Al: Well, sit down, Tom.
Nuttall:Don’t subject me to death by water
torture.
Al: Take a seat Tom, and toss whatever book
you’ve been readin’ on the fuckin’ yellow peril, huh?
(Nuttall
sits down, to EB’s right. Charlie
Utter walks in.)
Utter:
I just opened across the
way. Was I supposed to
attend?
Al: Well, before I can answer that question, I
better know who the fuck you are.
Utter: Charlie
Utter.
Merrick: Of
“Utter’s Freight and Postal Delivery Service.”
Al: Nice sign blocking my fucking view. Take a seat.
Merrick:
Had a lovely advert in today’s “Pioneer.”
Al: So, U.S. Government’s negotiating peace
with Spotted Elk, Red Cloud and other leaders of the heathens. (Johnny places some peaches down in front of
Al.) Thank you, Johnny. The
heathens will get money to give up the hills and the hills’ll be annexed to the
territory. (Sol looks over and sees Trixie observing
things, the other whores begin to join her.) Cost to avoid getting fucked in the
ass by those legislative cocksuckers was just handed to me by Yankton’s toll
collector, who suggests also our best case in keeping title to the claims,
property and businesses is to start up now, a kind of an informal governing
organization that will be recognized by the territorial cocksuckers and given
legal status when the territory is annexed, since we’ll all have proved
ourselves civilized sorts that don’t only wear our pants to cover our
tails. Hence the fuckin’
meeting.
EB: (To
Nuttall) Do the bribes come out of our pockets?
Al: (To
Cy) Hmm?
Cy:The
hell you must have gone through talking to that leech, Al. Hereafter, you let me take my fair share
of the weight in those conversations.
Al: Yeah, thanks, Cy.
EB: Well, couldn’t our informal organization
levy taxes on the settlement to pay the bribes, say to license businesses? Wouldn’t that spread the
burden?
Eddie: Will
women who pay the license fees have the same tight to operate brothels as
me?
(Al and Cy
both look at Eddie. Trixie crosses
her arms and smirks.)
Nuttall:
(To EB) What’s that got to do with the price of
fish?
Al: Our proper order of business is to make titles and
departments before the territorial cocksuckers send in their cousins to rob and
steal from us.
EB: Well, who fills the various
positions?
Al: Pick the names from a fuckin’ hat as far
as I’m concerned. (Points to Cy’s top hat sitting on the
table.)
EB: I’d like to be mayor. (Nuttall smiles.)
Al: Objections? (Merrick starts to open his mouth – Al
pounds the table with his fist, gavel-like – points to EB) Mayor. (Everyone has frozen looks on their
face.)
Seth: Wouldn’t a good use for an informal government with
temporary appointees be providing a few services to the
camp?
Al: Mayor?
EB: Well, provide a few services and use the lion’s share
of revenues to pay the bribes. (Dan strides in and approaches Al). More than providing services to ‘em,
taking peoples money is what makes organizations real, be they formal, informal
or temporary.
Dan: (talking low in Al’s ear) There’s a piano outside. (Al gives him a blank look) Piano? Uh, well, when Tolliver
opened up across the way, you said we needed a fancier piano. You ordered one.
Al: You
want me to abandon the fucking meeting to bring in a new
piano?
Dan: Well, I’m just telling you it come in from Montgomery
Ward.
Al: Yeah.
Dan: “Any big arrival, notify me immediately”
you said that.
Al: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Dan: Well, um---
EB: Floors open for levy suggestions and
nominations for department heads.
Self-nominations are permitted.
(EB bangs
an ashtray as a gavel, sending up clouds of dust into Nuttall’s
face)
EB: Sorry.
We lack a gavel.
Doc?
Doc: Who’s gonna be
comptroller?
Merrick:
Well, um, elections? W-will we have
some elections somewhere down the road?
This is temporary, right?
EB: Yeah, ad hoc.
Merrick:
Ad hoc. Ad h—
Al: Ad fucking hoc. So free fucking gratis. Can we just get on with the fucking meeting?
(Nighttime,
the street is filled with men. The
Gem is crowded and festive the piano is playing and people are crowded around
it. Merrick is
pondering.)
Merrick: Timid, huh.
Hardly, sir. My own strong
personal impulse was to offer my name for office but a fourth estate,
independent in name and fact from the operations of government is of the essence
of a free society.
(While
Merrick is pondering, we see E.B. in the back of the room getting a hand job
from a whore. Al is watching with
Dan, behind the bar.)
Al: I have got to find an early occasion to put the mayor
off his pedestal.
Dan: Don’t do it with no
nudge.
Al: Did you wait a day before you ordered that
fucking thing?
Dan: (Eating peaches with his substantial knife)
Mmm, boss, you specifically countermanded my waitin’ and askin’ again when
you give me the order to get it.
Al: What fuckin’ revenue is being generated by these
hoople-heads gathering around that cocksucker and yodelin’ about their fuckin’
points of origin?
Dan: Shine’ll wear off.
Al: (Puts his had to his forehead) My
fucking head.
Dan: All that organizing businesses?
Al: Aw, 25 cups of coffee and too much
circulatin’ in the fresh air.
Dan: You chaired the piss out of that meetin’
this afternoon.
Al: (Picks up a fork and points it at Dan)
That still don’t get you off the hook about that
piano.
(As Al
turns around to walk off Dan points his knife back at Al in a mocking fashion to
Al’s pointing of the fork.)
(Seth and
Sol are sitting on the Hardware Store porch, watching the sunset, Sol smoking a
pipe and Seth smoking a cigar.)
Sol: Before I’d told a story on myself, like the Doc did,
I’d have just said, “Thank you for the nomination, but I decline being health
supervisor.”
Seth: They buy
bodies to do their research.
Doctors, they cut ‘em open and study ‘em.
Sol: All the less reason for saying you’ve been
arrested for grave robbing. Seven
times. Anyways, good for you
volunteering for the post.
Seth: If I had known
then they wasn’t gonna have a sheriff, I’d never raised my
hand.
Sol: I don’t follow.
Seth: I only
raised my hand ‘cause I didn’t want to be sheriff. It’s all temporary,
anyhow.
Sol: That’s right.
Seth: And ad
hoc.
Sol: Did you happen to notice at the Gem that
one girl we rode back with from Mrs. Garrett’s funeral?
Seth: Trixie,
isn’t that what she said her name was?
Sol: Who’d been helping Mrs. Garrett with the
child.
Seth: Yeah, I
noticed her.
Sol:Much
as she’d taken to helping with that little one.
Seth: Big pull
to that, goin’ back to what you know.
Sol: You think she’s
pretty?
Seth: Very.
Sol: (Taps
out his pipe, stands up) Take some air.
Seth: Yes, sir.
(Utter
approaches as Sol starts to leave)
Utter:
Evenin’
Sol:
Evening.
Utter: Some meetin’
huh?
Sol:
Congratulations on your new post.
Utter:
Oh.
Sol: And for your freight
business.
Utter: Thank
you.
Sol:
Okay. (Takes off)
Seth: Evening, Charlie.
Utter: Evenin’. (Sits down, sighs) How much time you
think that fire marshal obligation’s gonna take? (Seth just shakes his head) More or less
as much as your health commissioner, huh? (Chuckles). How about that doc? Grave Robber. (Seth smiles and
nods)
(Nuttall
approaching Johnny in the Gem)
Nuttall: Anybody
else felled from them canned peaches?
Johnny
Uh, not to my knowledge. Why, you
feelin’ poorly?
Nuttall: Well, um, uh.
it’s – it’s easin’ up some.
(Nuttall
walks off quickly, Sol is walking through the Gem, looking for Trixie. He waves hello to Al as he passes him
and walks up to Trixie. Al keeps an
eye on them.)
Sol: Evenin’.
Trixie:
Evenin’
Sol: I’ve wondered how things were with you…and Mrs.
Garrett and the child.
Trixie: (She looks to her right, at Al, he walks
off) I expect they’re doing well.
You know she struck lucky at her claim.
Sol: And how are you,
Trixie?
Trixie: As you
see, earnin’ the greasy eye from my boss for idle chatter.
Sol: Can I buy you a
drink?
Trixie:
I’d rather you didn’t. (A john and a whore run through the hall
between them) This isn’t the
place for you.
Sol: So YOU say.
Trixie: If
you insist on my embarrassing myself, have it not where I’d want you to see
me.
Sol: Come see me then.
Trixie:
He don’t permit our making calls
out.
Sol: Come to our store. Come buy a broom.
Trixie: I don’t
want what I can’t have, Mr. Star.
Sol: Alright. (Puts his hat back on, starts to
leave.)
Trixie:
If I did come, I’d buy and ax, a
hammer, and a saw.
Sol: All fully stocked. And we never ask the purpose of a
customer’s purchase.
(Trixie
smiles , Sol tips his hat and leaves.
On his way out, Merrick stops him.)
Merrick: Our mayor. (Looks over to the piano where just behind
it, EB is drunk and barely standing upright) Oh, Mayor! (EB takes his hat off and waves it
around. They laugh and Sol slaps
Merrick on the shoulder and leaves.)
(Doc
returns to the pest tent)
Rev: Doctor.
Doc: I’m gonna have a look at
you.
Rev: Alright.
Doc: Don’t turn your head away, Reverend. Bein’
sick ain’t nothin’ to be ashamed of.
(The Rev crooks his head more
forward.) Look at my finger.
Rev: I apologize for the smell.
Doc: What is it that you
smell?
Rev: As if I’ve died.
Doc: You emit no such
odor.
Rev: I smell my flesh
rotting.
Doc: It isn’t rotting, Reverend. Your flesh does not smell. You have not died. You’re having organic changes in your
mind that’s making you believe these things. Do you understand
me?
Rev: Formerly, Doctor, when the word took me as
I read scripture, people felt God’s presence through me and that was a great
gift that I could give to them. Now
the word does not take me when I read nor do I feel Christ’s love. Nor do those who listen hear it through
me.
Doc: Alright.
Rev: This is God’s purpose. The not knowing the purpose is my
portion of suffering.
Doc: And is there any pain competing with the
not knowing?
Rev: I’m not in pain. There are new smells, I smell, and there
are parts of my body I can’t feel, and His—and His love.
Doc: (shaking his head from side to side) And
you want to continue like this?
Rev: As long as He wills, this must be my part. To be afraid, as
well.
Doc: Well,
if this is His will, Reverend, He is a sonofabitch. Goodnight. (The Doc gets up and
leaves)
Rev: Goodnight, Doctor.
(Joanie
enters the Bella Union and approaches Eddie)
Joanie:
Hey,
Eddie.
Eddie: Hey, kid. How’d it go?
Joanie:
Alright. And I got me a four-bit room. Play your cards right, I’ll tell you
where. (She walks off – Cy is in his office. She enters)
Joanie:
Hi, Cy.
Cy: Was afraid I’d lost you to the
heathens.
Joanie:
How was that
meeting?
Cy: Alright, we were organizing for annexation
until Eddie cracked his fuckin’ mouth.
Joanie:
What’d it turn to
then?
Cy: (Laughing) Joint like ours, Joanie, what
are we selling? Walk through this
door, it’s a new start. Come on in,
try your luck here. Of course, we
know the percentages bein’ the percentages, you play long enough, your luck
ain’t gonna get no better here than anywheres else. Maybe it’s ‘cause we’re in a brand new
camp. Since we arrived, certain
people that are near and dear to me seem to have bought into our own fuckin’
line and now they’re trying to get me to go along. But I can’t. See, Joanie, (stands up) ‘cause I’m a big boy. Now, I’m ready for…Eddie and me to have
a little chat.
Joanie:
I did look around for places,
Cy.
Cy: Good, I wanted you
to.
Joanie:
I want to go ahead and do
what we talked about.
Cy: Good, honey. With your eyes wide open. (draws a line with his finger back and forth
between their eyes. He walks out of
the office, approaches Eddie at the bar, who is shuffling cards, and taps the
bar for a drink.) Eddie
Sawyer.
Eddie: Can we keep this short?
Cy: Sure, Eddie. If he finds you a 12 year-old farm boy
to have some fun with, is that short enough for you?
Eddie: I
never did that and you know it.
Cy: All this crap about what is and isn’t
natural, whatever does it for a fella is what does it, ain’t that
right?
Eddie: I never
did that.
Cy: But did you ever want to unbutton some
farm boy’s dentons and get yourself some relaxation? That’s what I’m askin’ you? Take that boy you spoke up for up in
Joanie’s room the other day.
Eddie: I
spoke up for not torturing that boy.
Cy: Well, what you spoke
for I (We see Joanie going upstairs,
watching their exchange) and what you would have wanted to do if it was just
you and that corn-fed in that room alone is what I’m inquiring about the
difference between.
Eddie: A
dry hole, Cy.
Cy: Aw, you could work that out. You just use some spit on that or
lard. (Eddie shakes his head no in disgust, tries
to pick up his cards, Cy grabs them and slams them down away from Eddie.) 17
fuckin’ years and I never saw a look on your face I saw up there in that room
the other day, including when I had to smack some girl
around.
Eddie: I was
never in a room with you before where you was gonna kill
somebody.
Cy: Now, I do not make judgments. I gave that up a long time ago. All I want is for us to get along
better, Eddie. So every time you
open your mouth in public, I don’t have to worry about what the fuck’s gonna
come out! So let me get you some
fuckin’ kid to fuck in the ass or the mouth or suck his prick, or let him fuck
you!
Eddie: Fuck
you, Cy. Fuck
You.
Cy: Yeah, now, now. That’s where I draw the line. Friend or no friend, and us wantin’ to
get along better or not. I want you
to go up into Joanie’s room which I – I gather she don’t want to go into no
more. I want you to go up there
with that boy like you were the other day, only this time it’s just him and
you. And I want you to figure out
what it is that you want. ‘Cause
next time we see each other, I want you clear headed, Eddie, and understanding
yourself. The old Eddie that knows
the percentages and how to play ‘em, and whatever a man does away from the table
is his own fuckin’ business. I want
you cheerful and ready to help me with my work. Or I don’t want you comin’ the fuck
out! Hmm? (Joanie is at the top of the stairs,
sitting, she stands up when she hears this) You finish your shift and you go
up there to Joanie’s room. You
think things though. Alright, Eddie
Sawyer? (Slams the cards back down in front of
Eddie) Do we understand each other?
Eddie: Why
didn’t you volunteer for something at that meeting? Why didn’t you put your hand up? Might’ve kept you from bein’ such an
evil cocksucker.
(Eddie
walks away. Cy drinks the rest of
his whiskey in one shot.)
(Jane is
sitting on a bench outside of Charlie’s freight
business.)
Utter:
Say hello to the new fire
marshal.
(Jane
throws her arms up, smiling)
Jane: I’m
gettin’ out. Goodbye and good
luck.
Utter:
Well, wait on until you ain’t
exhausted, Jane, and maybe you’ll change your mind.
Jane: Direction of this entire camp makes me sick, and it
bores the livin’ shit out of me.
Utter:
Well, workin’ hours like
you’ve been workin’, it’d get anyone out of sorts. And you helped a lot of
people.
Jane: Sent a dozen
men out with their plague sores healed to go back to gettin’ ‘em on their
johnsons. I will not be a drunk
where he’s buried and I cannot stay fuckin’ sober. (Puts the lid back on her canteen) So
you and every human being on earth, past present and future, can drink mare’s
piss.
Utter: I believe I’ll
just have well water.
Jane: Shut up,
Charlie. (smiling)
Utter: Alright.
Jane: (Gets up, picks up her saddle bag, bed roll
and rope) If the subject comes up, explain to Bill.
Utter:
Alright,
Jane.
Jane: Alright. (She heads off)
Utter: Tell them over at the livery I—I’m good for the
mount.
Jane: Do not fuckin’
worry about me. And inform
Hostetler at the fuckin’ livery you saved his fuckin’
life.
Utter:
Alright.
Jane: (Walking away, yelling, but not looking
back) And do not worry about getting’ paid back. Check the mail, Charlie, and you will
find soon proper payment.
Utter:
Alright,
Jane.
Jane: Check
with Utter Mail and Charlie Freight!
Utter: Alright.
(The Gem,
Trixie is entering Al’s bedroom)
Al: Since last our eyes were upon each other, lo, I hope
you’ve earned me 5 dollars.
Trixie: No. (Closes
the shutters to Al’s office area).
(At the
hotel, Seth is in the lobby, waiting.
The redhead approaches him)
Redhead:
I uh, I gave the lady your note,
sir. She says to come ahead but to
knock low as the little one’s asleep.
Seth: Thank you.
(The
redhead hands him a paper, Seth gives him a tip)
Redhead:
Thank you,
sir.
(Seth heads
upstairs. Alma is in her room,
sitting at the little table, watching Sophia sleep. There is a knock at the door. She gets up, smoothes out her dress and
pats at her hair. She opens the door)
Seth: Evenin’
Alma: Good Evening,
Mr. Bullock. Sophia’s
asleep.
Seth: So I was
told. I’m sorry for calling so
late. (Enters) I’m to see Ellsworth in the
morning and wondered what I should say.
Alma: Ellsworth
seemed very competent and trustworthy.
He suggested that until the extent of the quartz deposits could be
proved, he could prospect the creek on my claim each week to keep my title
active.
Seth: How’d that
plan sound to you?
Alma: I feel it’s
exactly the way to proceed.
Seth: Alright,
then.
Alma: Won’t you sit
down?
Seth: Thank
you. (Alma closes the door of the bedchamber to
just a crack, they sit at the little table.) Would it improve your opinion of me
if I told you I was commissioner of the board of health?
Alma: (Laughingly) How wonderful, I
suppose.
Seth: It’s to put the camp’s best foot forward as far as
being taken into the territory. A
number of men took positions.
Alma: I
see.
Seth: Farnum’s
mayor.
Alma: How
horrifying. (Seth smiles and raises his eyebrows)
Uh.
Seth: I wrote to my
wife today.
Alma: (Freezes momentarily) Did
you?
Seth: About her and my boy coming to
camp.
Alma: You have a son
as well?
Seth: They’re
in Michigan with her people. My
thinkin’ was with the treaty comin’ annexation, the camp would be settling down,
a safer place.
Alma: Yes. (Pause – Alma looks down at her hands)
Any other sons or daughters?
Seth: No,
that’s it. My brother was in the
Calvary. He was killed two years
ago.
Alma: I’m
sorry.
Seth: Anyways. (Gets up) I’m glad you got along with
Ellsworth.
Alma: Well, thank
you for all your help, Mr. Bullock.
Seth: Sure.
Alma: And
congratulations on your new post…and the prospect of your family rejoining
you.
Seth: Thank
you. Good night, Mrs.
Garrett.
Alma: Goodnight (As she’s opening the door for him) May
I ask why you spoke of your brother?
Seth: My wife
was his widow. My boy is their
child.
Alma: I see. Goodnight.
Seth: Goodnight. (Seth leaves.)
(Alma shuts
the door, leans against the wall and puts her hands to her stomach. Shakes her head, bites her lips, leans
over and blows out the oil lamp.)
The End
Written by George Putnam
Directed by Ed Bianchi
Al Swearengen: Ian McShane Dan Dority: W Earl Brown
Seth Bullock: Timothy Olyphant
Alma Garret: Molly Parker
Ellsworth: Jim Beaver
Doc Cochran: Brad
Dourif
Sol Star: John Hawkes
Trixie: Paula
Malcomson
Tom Nuttall: Leon Rippy
Cy Tolliver: Powers Boothe
Leon: Larry Cedar
Sophia: Bree Seanna Wall |
E.B. Farnum: William Sanderson
Calamity Jane: Robin Weigert
Charlie Utter: Dayton Callie Johnny Burns: Sean Bridgers
Andy Cramed: Zach Grenier
Jewel: Geri
Jewell
A. W. Merrick: Jeffrey Jones
Rev. Smith: Ray McKinnon
Mr. Wu: Keone Young
Joanie Stubbs: Kim Dickens
Con Stapleton: Peter Jason
Eddie Sawyer: Ricky Jay |
Transcription last updated on 02/06/2007 | |
Deadwood transcription from
www.CalamityDan.com These transcriptions are the property of
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